Piano Guidance
Piano Guidance
Photo: Alena Darmel
For some people, musical anhedonia is a life-long trait, while in other cases it may be a response to trauma or a symptom of disorders like depression (“it's not a disorder in and of itself,” clarifies Professor Scott.) It could be something that changes over time, or something you're stuck with.
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Read More »For many of us, listening to music goes beyond just a leisure activity. It’s the soundtrack that affords cinematic grandeur to activities as banal as getting the bus to work. It’s the backdrop to our agony and ecstasy; our nights out and our hangovers the next day. Whether you're into the soft meditations of Frank Ocean or the thrashing chords of Teenage Fanclub, it can be difficult for music lovers to imagine not experiencing it so intensely. But for the estimated three to five percent of the population who experience musical anhedonia, listening to music offers little to no pleasure. To understand musical anhedonia, it’s helpful to consider what happens to the brains of music lovers when they listen to music they like. “You’re hearing a complex sound so you get a lot of brain activation,” says Professor Sophie Scott, a neuroscientist at UCL. “When you hear a song you have a real emotional connection to, there’s data showing that your brain’s reward system is engaged. You get a release of neurotransmitters which are associated with winning a real prize, so there’s an element of the enjoyment that you’d get from something physical like gambling or recreational drugs. But, crucially, you only get this response through music you like.” In a sense, musical anhedonia can be defined as the absence of this reaction. “There was a study done with people with anhedonia where they were played music and didn’t even show a hint of this reward response,” Professor Scott says, “but they did show it if you scanned them while they were gambling and they won. It’s not that their reward systems aren’t active, they’re just not activated by music.” It’s not so difficult to imagine what this is like: in a sense, we all experience musical anhedonia when we listen to a song that does nothing for us. It’s just that they experience that with all of it. For some people, musical anhedonia is a life-long trait, while in other cases it may be a response to trauma or a symptom of disorders like depression (“it’s not a disorder in and of itself,” clarifies Professor Scott.) It could be something that changes over time, or something you’re stuck with. Some don’t miss listening to music, while others really, really do. I spoke to a number of people who have experienced musical anhedonia, for different reasons and in different ways. Here are some of their accounts.
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Read More »I grew up in a 'musical house' (although I hate the idea of calling it that). My dad was in bands all his life and he was constantly playing the guitar. I found it incredibly irritating and still do. We'd go on these long drives down the country and we'd always have to listen to some awful prog music. Eventually I managed to get out of it by convincing them to listen to audiobooks. For my 18th birthday my friends all chipped in and got me a ticket to Oxygen (a festival in Ireland). I really didn't want to go but I couldn't throw such a thoughtful gift in their faces. I enjoyed every bit of it except the actual music (and the toilets). At the Foo Fighters, all my friends were doing festival things like putting their hands in the air or singing along or whatever and I had no idea what to do with my hands or body or anything. I thought everyone looked ludicrous. I remember some lad I didn't know leaning over and saying in my ear “what's your problem?” because I had my arms folded. Not enjoying music was alienating, but also tinged with this feeling of superiority I had about not liking it. Basically, I thought everyone else was the idiot for liking it rather than realising I was the weird one. Things changed when I was 21. I was the station manager of my college radio station and I became friends with the music editor. I started listening to his radio show and something just clicked. He kind of de-pretentious’d music for me and convinced me I was wrong for thinking it was pretentious. I can safely say I'm now genuinely into music. I listen to it, I read about it, I watch documentaries about it. I’m not sure whether I regret the years I didn’t like music. I didn't go through any phase of trying to look like I was in Razorlight, unlike most of my friends,. I'm glad I don't have any nostalgic attachment to the shit, apolitical indie music of the early 2000s. Jeffrey: "Right now, I have 22 songs I can listen to, from my whole life" I never really thought about the fact that I didn’t enjoy music until I was around 12, when the difference in my feelings for music became a lot more obvious. I remember people listening to and talking about it all the time. In most social circles you had to be able to talk about music, or else you would be left out. So I listened to other people’s music, but I just couldn't get into it. I would occasionally find a song that would bring me a small amount of enjoyment, but that always faded after I listened to it a couple of times. As of right now, I have a total of 22 songs that I sometimes listen to in the car. That's all the music I've been able to muster from searching my whole life. Half of these songs come from anime, video games or movies, and most of them have no vocals. My taste could be described as something like "epic music" – it tends to evoke feelings of action or pumps you up. Even this, though, doesn't make me feel all that much. I have always been odd. Musical anhedonia was just another way I felt different than others. I feel like I've missed out on friendships and social situations because of it. But I don't really feel like I am missing out from feeling an emotional reaction to it. Personally, I would find it annoying feeling something every time I heard a song. Emotion often clouds judgement, so having emotion be brought to the surface by sounds seems like a disadvantage. I have definitely accepted that unless I receive some kind of weird brain injury, I will never enjoy music like other people will. It doesn't bother me that I don't feel much from music. What bothers me more is the social isolation and loneliness it can contribute to. I wish musical people were more accepting of non-musical people.
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